Thursday, March 18, 2010

Doesn't matter

Hello America,

Yes, it's been a minute over my mom's house.  over my mom's house having some domestic problems for your you know what...................

You know America, I try to be very honest and open, not b/c I am a glutton for judgment, but b/c so much of my business is out there.  Every time, I get an opportunity to get on my feet, Delmar and his wonderful mother come up with some plot or plan to take me down.  The last time, they coordinated together and delmar ended up broke unable to help me get somewhere to stay, but I got somewhere to stay on my own.

Today's drama, involves him cutting up all of my clothes, which is nothing new, I didn't have much, thank God and the one pair of shoes I do have, I have on.  All about setting things in chaos, right when I need to be sleep and concentrating on work.  Why do I put up with him and this?  It is deeper than love, I really feel that this is a spritual battle between good and evil with Mr. Meadows caught in the crossfire.

All this week, folk have been bringing up his dead aunt who he was close to, just all kind of messy drama that I am not going to get into.  I haven't been home yet, spent all day washing, just for him to tear up my clothes.  I am tired, cramping, back hurting, don't have nowhere to sleep, too scared to go home.  A long time ago, Delmar and his mom did something to me and my mom, that I cannot stand for.  They used our identities.  Instead of respecting the fact that I have given my life to the Lord, they take it upon themselves to cause drama, to get me to kick him out. to get me off balance so that I can lose my job and be forced to sell drugs and fool with Ms. hearne and her son in the way they want.

No, you know what I did, America, I did just the opposite.  I told him I love him, cut off the phone of course, probably has called his friend, Mr. Jimmy by now and left.  He took all of the seeds, so now you really know that I have changed my life, b/c I don't have anything to grow outside of the vegetables that we put down.  He took the equipment that he didn't break and moved on.  I don't know, haven't been home.


Not b/c I am not hurting, I am.  I just so beyond that.  Now, all of my friends have stopped talking again.  They wonder if I am going to put him out, not unless he wants to leave, he ain't got nowhere to go.  He is stuck b/c he has made a deal with the devil and I am not signing off.

So I am going to go now, I will be at work tomorrow.  Don't know if my home won't be broken into tomorrow.  I am not kicking Delmar out.  Not worried about no marijuana.  Not worried about jimmy and the like.  I am simply taking it day by day in God's hands, SO TOMORROW IF YOU WANT TO PULL THE SAME BULL, be it Delmar, be it through him, or at my job, or whatever, doesn't matter.

I ain't going to stop doing what I do.  And that's going to work everyday, paying my bills, and trying my best to help this man see that I am not the enemy.  or maybe I am, if I cannot live the life that he and his mom need me to to avoid prosecution and payback from all of this identity theft mess.

Are we clear, America?  I don't care anymore.  I don't care whether I have one pair of panties or not.  I got a job going to work.  Is that clear, Ms. Stephenson?  You and your son, cannot have me the way you want.  Not your slave, not your flunkie.

Either Delmar chooses one path with me or one with you.  But you will not break me, Dallas, America, I ain't giving up my house.  I ain't losing my job.  I am not going to do business with those I chose not to.  I can and will stay by myself if needed.

B/c what the hell you do to me is in God's hand and the rest of the bulls*** don't matter.

Now is that enough real talk for you, is that keeping it as real as it can be.  Is this not the truman show gone horribly wrong?  To the Obama administration, dirty pool what like #251, but you will not break me.

told you all I was around.
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