Friday, October 21, 2011

The Book of B&B (Basslines and Baseball) Chapter 29

Hello America,

I am going to speak briefly today.  I am starting work in a couple of weeks

in order to grow, one has to be honest, one has to accept the pains of maturation.

When I start getting personal like this, this means I am introducing you to a new book, no John McCain breathe easy dude, it is not the Book of Tiffani, I am not ready for that one yet ;)

But my point this morning is that everyone has a place, everything has a place and part of growing up is learning that, experience is costly and there is nothing you can do to avoid, but you learn.

I learned from Ron Washington the power of honesty.  I remember that he made some play the other day, I can't remember he didn't take someone one last series or something, and he said I was wrong, I was mad.  I was just wrong.


That's power, that's power in your faith, that's power in yourself to be able to say, I was wrong, I was mad, I was hurt, or whatever the situation is and I made a mistake. I am not going to run for it, ain't no need to try to rationalize or blame someone else.  It's all on me. 

No wonder his team loves him so much, Rick Carlisle the Dallas Maverick coach did something last season to the same effect, didn't get too much into detail, it was during the finals or something, he moved the rotation or whatever, something, and he just said I was wrong.  I made a mistake.

No wonder his team loves him so much. It's weird because both of the teams when asked about the mistakes were just like that's Wash, that's coach, gave both of the men a pat on the butt, you know the sports kind.... and went on.  That was enough for them, they wanted the acknowledgment of their leaders admitting they were wrong and went on. 

Since I know I am going to run in the next election cycle, not '12, I have started amassing a team.  I have tried to since I came back to Dallas in '09, but didn't realize how sick I was and some things I needed to let go of professional and personally.  My asst is an independent thinker, but votes Democrat.  My coach, yes we have them in politics, Perry and Cain are what happens when you don't. is a very independent thinker but supports Perry, not a Bachmann fan at all.

So last night, I want to watch the game, but I can't I have class, so I talked to my coach, she's a Rove of regulations, any bill, any legislative concept, I write my questions down and I ask her and I learn.  Running for office is a little deeper than God told me to do it, well it's not, but it is, but I don't want to be like the candidates of today with a phrase and then a policy.

.  I think the American public deserves someone who just is what they are and that means not being perfect, willing to admit mistakes and having a platform, doing the homework.

As I am talking to my coach, Perry came up, my coach doesn't sway my opinion, she knows I am young, especially politically for the office I seek, she knows I have to walk my own path, she never judges, but she does come with facts.

So James here you go.  Part of growing up is getting better.  Part of getting better politically is having more than a layman's understanding of an issue and more than a layman's criticism of an issue.  I am not changing my mind about supporting you, but I was wrong.  Not of anything personal but because of lack of knowledge, it was irresponsible of me considering my voice to not have it thoroughly researched and my coach had surgery was letting her heal, I thought I had done enough but I hadn't.


In regards to in state tuition, my sister is a bilingual teacher so I am fully aware of a state case that mandates that regardless of citizenship status of a student, the public school system is obligated to provide them with an "adequate" education.  This is not a discussion of whether that is right or not, I don't agree, but I am explaining why I have to apologize to Gov. Perry.  Because he is the Executive of the State of Texas, he is bound through his position to enforce that.  That includes an concerted emphasis on bilingual education that charter schools and private schools are not obligated to.  This was no fault of Gov. Perry,

this was a court ruling.  My feelings on that are for another day.

Militant sects of groups like La Raza were getting to the point of becoming violent advcates on behalf of these illegal students because they were precluded from having a chance at higher education.  So Gov. Perry drafted a program in which if students attended public Texas schools by their sophmore year, they could be treated as a Texas public school student and receive in state tuition rates in exchange for the path of citizenship to be started in regards to paperwork and all that type of stuff. Out of 165,000 eligible students only 1% or 10% have taken advantage of the offer due to the citizenship requirement.  I can't say because this was in a conversation and I was preparing for class and I didn't write it down.

DO I AGREE WITH IT? NO. BY ANY MEANS. I would have handled the situation different because I would have politely locked up those violent members and told them during visitation hours about helping their young illegal brothers and sisters by working within the system and not using violence........

But I am not the Governor and it was his call.

So what I am apologizing for you is an uneducated and misinformed criticism of your program, Gov. Perry.  You need better mouthpieces to articulate points like this like myself......but for other issues, I just haven't made up my mind what I will do if my big Sis is not there.

And because right is right, I respectfully ask Michelle Bachmann to chill on that issue because Minnesota does the same thing.

I cannot blame the states in full when we have a terrorist........Gosh darnit, I mean President, who hides illegal relatives, tells good illegals to keep working and not expect them to engage in sexual activity and not have babies or bring the ones they already have.  

As both of us being Texans, Gov. Perry knows the passion that lies in my heart and I in his.  So Texan to Texan,

I was wrong, I didn't mean to be out of malice, but I was out of ignorance.

Thank you Ron Washington and Rick Carlisle for giving me the courage to say that.  It helped me.

Which leads to my next point, I didn't get to watch the game, but I was keeping abreast of the score through my mom.

Tomorrow is all Ranger Day, so we'll get a little more detail tomorrow, but thank you Colby Lewis.

I know today's spin is less about the Rangers winning and showing heart than LaRussa making a mistake.

But the 9th inning wouldn't have been a concern if that Rangers pitching staff that ain't worth a crap, didn't come up and show regardless, they came to play.  And Colby came to play and if you read Colby's story just like many of the other rangers, wasn't no anita baker fairy tales, wasn't coming to work in no car, he didn't have one, just like many of us, his family dropped him off, but none of that matter to Colby last night, he didn't care about showing the world, the pundits they were wrong about him, he just played Ranger ball.  He pitched and he pitched and shut these Louie sluggers that keep those Louisville sluggers in business down.

Thank you to Nelson Cruz, baby, I hope that you weren't hurt hitting that wall, you wanna be like Mike? Mike always made sure defense was a priority, just because you not swinging no homers, don't mean we don't love on you.. we don't appreciate you.

Thank you, Elvis Andrews, for and yes pundits there is a political point, for a move with ian that was like Jason Kidd alleyopping to Tyson Chandler, but it was for defense.  Thank both of you for that.

The political point is that without defense........... there won't be a 9th inning.

Iowa, no need to complain about Romney not taking you seriously when you giving him your state, why should he, he didn't earn it, but you giving to him anyway.

Ain't no need for him to be concerned about you in the 9th inning, when you didn't defend your political importance in the 5th.......

So I got out of class, had to catch the bus, couldn't watch the game, the 9th inning had just started.  And Ian had just got on base.  Ian, your nickname is Apple.  baby you Ihit, Isteal, Irun,Idefend you get my point, and I couldn't even pray with my eyes closed because I didn't want to miss the bus, so I just prayed with my eyes open and I said Lord, please let me remain calm, let me use this moment not for my ego to be fulfilled but for your word to be fulfilled........

I said that prayer because I knew, what was to come, think I am lying think I am crazy, we are going to end with that discussion today, read the lyrics yesterday, Josh and Elvis... I have no need to lie, if this words didn't come from God, I would be a bookie's office right now collecting but how can I on his word

So I am riding the bus praying and praising God the whole way because I know he works his will his way, and every ball on the little gamecast screen on espn, I am praying, praying and so quiet on the bus even though folks is asking about the game.  And Ian just Lord, baby, he took those jack words to heart and just said I need that.

My brothers need that.

My ranger nation needs that.

And dammit I am going to get that.

My praise doesn't cease and Elvis gets on, and here comes Josh and when Josh sacrficied. SACRIFICED his body, baby boy I know you were hurting, I know you got girls to walk down the aisle one day........All I could do is praise his name because he writes the story, not me.  Josh and I and the Rangers are second, never first.

But I knew it wasn't over, I was not to get out of my seat, but it was hard not for the game of baseball, America, but for the game of life, for the game of 2012.  So young comes up, and another sacrifice, hmmm..... two castoffs, one too messed up, one too old, helping their younger brothers have a chance.

But it wasn't over was it, America?  Rather it was far from over, the bottom of the 9th started with the bottom of the 8th when Washington left in Adams, he trusted his brother,  he trusted him and Adams came through.....but would that trust had been there if Washington didn't have to courage to admit mistakes?

And Felix comes in and does what he does..... And God's glory is set.

I knew yesterday morning what would happen, and I am not Ms. Cleo, my hotline is to a deeper source because God has a message.

Every play matters, in your life, in a game, in an election and you won't get all of them right, but when you have a team that trusts you because you have the audacity and the courage to be yourself, you create a team and what that team, when every man or woman on it, is willing to fight, claw, use antlers, whatever until the clock stops, until the game is over officially.


I got home last night and this is the end, not about baseball, it is about a deeper lesson and these folks as I am walking home offered me drugs.  Why I don't know?  I used to sell drugs, if I wanted some crack I would just go to where I used to buy it wholesale.  I guess and I know there are those who part of my past now who are hoping and wishing that I didn't learn from that game, that I didn't get the message God used the Rangers to help me learn.  That it is never over to never give up.

So many years, I have looked bad, felt bad, been dispondent, staying with my ex-husband walking the path of his personal battles with him that folks are hoping that his path became or becomes rather my path.  Hard to get folk to understand that I view marriage not as a promise to that person, but as a promise to God regarding that person.  And everyday, EVERYDAY, i stayed, I prayed until one day God told me your job is done. 

Just like last night, I didn't stop because it was the top of the 9th inning and even if Ian got on base, he didn't have it in him to steal a base and risk a tie. And the same was true with my ex, and its hard for people especially those who know me including my family to understand my path, my relationship with God.

So after of course I got home and I turned down the dudes offer to get high, or whatever, was the plan, my phone was full, with messages and calls verifying that I am okay.  that I didn't go with these men and do whatever as the person who the lies is coming from is telling herself and all of those who know me whatever lie she can think of to justify her acts and praying to God it comes true so that she not I can be validated.......

There was a time where I would have taken offense, been pissed at folk for calling, but I am getting older I understand more now.  It's hard to see someone you love go off on a destructive path, and you have to defend your heart, your feelings first.  I get that now.  I get when you walking a path from God that ain't the most beaten, hard for folk to see where you headed long team. 

So for all of those who thought I was crazy or still am ;), though I am doing this or that, trying to find whatever rationalization for my appearance, and it was bad at times admittedly, for my acts, my staying,  my leaving, my choices this is for you........ No matter what you hear, no matter what man or folk in my life, plan or pull, just like last night, don't question how I look or appear or act inning to inning because I play until the game is over, not when you all think it is over, no disrespect.

I wrote it last night because when I got in the house, I was still doing my homework and Jesus came in and said yo, we gotta go the studio, ......I'll deal with the executives when we get there.

I am like J, I got homework dude.........

Jesus is like for it tomorrow.

So we get to the studio and I am not happy, this semester is hard. And the executives say to me, Jesus and us made a deal so

(You're gonna rewrite the same song about his daddy)
(God so hard gotta find a way to praise G)

And I am like for real? God wants me to do in paris for him at midnight, I am tired, I want to go to bed.....  I look at Jesus, and he said Josh sacrificed, the team won on sacrifices, duh..........So I get my pen, went into the studio, glaring at Jesus because I am tired, but I understand, put my headphones on and said into the mike

I don't really care but y'all thought my marriage to bruh
I guess y'all thought my appearance meant, B.I.G. ready to die
Well, let's just get all of out the way, Imma give you what you need to hear!
Let’s get it

Big D, go outside and get the switch, I ain't Trina, but I'm God's baddest b****
Me and J up in the building got more than brintney spears so curious.
  My(God so hard), your feelings hurt, sorry to disappoint I wont defer
I walk path with a God so hard, had y'all thinking something wrong with herr
  My(God so hard), they wanna see me smoking crack on video like in DC?
Please know my(God so hard), one word from emerges empowered Tiffani
Just because I don't pay to play, don't mean My God don't know his way
  My(God so hard), I'm falling hard? Me and J are #boost tmobile calling cards
So yeah, I am back with no regard for what you thought about me dawg
36 years of slanging hopes, dreams and dope up and down Camp Wisdom Blvd
  My(God so hard), he made my life Forest Gump remixed so nastily
Just so I could rise up and say My God so hard trust , you be’ belee’ that my…

  God so hard bustas wanna try me
  Yeah Im back(What, ‘Ye?)
  Please pull that(Haaaa)
  Im needing that

  God so hard bustas say they know me?
Not goin crack(Huh, what, ‘Ye?)
  Please pull that(Yeah, yeah)
  Aint going back(Go, ay!)

  God So hard bustas wanna try me,  secrets prying out of me
Baby, bring your dope all my ex's please try me, I got G O D.
God so hard, he use me, to show dope,  don't phase me
Rolling Sixty, Zeta  blue, do what you do, spiritual banging made me
  God so hard, he the period, made you think I was outta here
God so hard, Me and J up in here, sold out of tickets cuz it ain't fair
Probable, I’m liable to go psycho, lick a stick then get high cuz you think I need a fix?
God so hard, it don't stop in a Rush to I BOC
all up ya lies that bought your time, drinking in the dugout red sox
  God so hard, he showing you, dont question how he do
I write to give him praise, I ain't worried about what you do
God so hard, he gonna walk me through these 40 days
 I can't help it he lets me use schwagg for my praise
God so hard, I get to testify using Kayne
No matter what he is my 67 highway

  God so hard Come on Big D
  That stuff cray
That stuff cray
That stuff cray

  God so hard Trials is Blessings See
That stuff cray
That stuff cray
That stuff cray

[Kanye West]
  God said“‘Some wanna really see your fall”
I said, “I depend on you for it all
We forget dude used to be Saul
in order to become a prophet in Paul”
(God so hard) That stuff cray (That stuff cray) Ain’t it, Jay?
(God so hard) It's his order? (What he order?) He is my way
(God so hard) “My God so cold!” (Whip so cold!) Praise his name
My beloved Dallas, We fatjoe, we make it rain
Crazy girl, make my band, aint no star but ready to dance
so play your games with my life, I am just sayin
It all part of his plan, He is the point G
‘Because he is the author of the World of Tiffani)
What up, my n*****? You sending  my killas?
Drama you figure? Greenday my last september?
You plans the illness, gonna break me with realness?
  F*** my life you like Paris, and you gonna film this(Hunh?)

And the executives say.....

(I don’t even know what that means!)
(No one knows what it means)
(But it’s provocative)
(No, it’s not)
(Gets the people goin’)

But Jesus stops the playback, and tells everyone in the studio, that's it........  The rest is for tomorrow.

 For those who are figuring just what is she saying.  that rap stuff is just out of hand, did she use Jesus in a Kayne song after apologizing to Perry and talking about the rangers.

Yeah, I did.  All I am saying is that because I chose to live a life that is drug and drama free, the good folks in Dallas that depend on me via identity theft through addresses and what not of their selection and I are having trouble.  I am not moving anywhere that those who participate in identity theft regarding my name can benefit from.  Nothing in my plans personally or politically will stop

The more you grow, the more those who live off you staying stagnant try to pull stuff to make your relationship with God, your ability to play until its all over diminsh.

But just like the song and the series, it's far from over.  And just like I learned from my daddy's and their coaches if I gotta sacrifice my ego and apologize or move across town or whatever is needed to be done......

There is nothing greater than the team, no ego, no stats, and thank you Texas Rangers for reminding me of that.

I'll be back tomorrow.  You all playing in Arlington against St. Louis.  I am going to have to play in Dallas against Dallas.  Thank you for reminding me of something I needed and thank you for giving me the courage to apologize.

I am not backing down, do what you need to do, Dallas because I am.
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