Saturday, October 29, 2011

The Book of B&B (Basslines and Baseball) Chapter 35

Hello America,

I have something that I have to do this morning as I am moving and I don't have time to write a full post.   tomorrow  we address the weekly addresses , too much is at stake to change that.

First of all to the singer who performed yesterday in the game, the first who sung the anthem, as I didn't get the name, a wonderful approach to the song in the sense you were aware of the limitations of your voice and worked with it not against beans.

Second, to the dude who did God Bless America,what tone..............! very cool beans, very cool beans.

To the St. Louis Cardinals from the organization down congratulations on your I believe 11th World Series, I cannot congratulate the MVP because I don't know who he is, no disrespect, I have a research proposal due Tuesday and the extension of the game had a collision with my writing time and school won.  But to whomever received, I am sure all of MLB and the squirrely nation can agree on it.

This is the first time this year, I have lost a championship as far as calling, and I usually dedicate a whole day to winners with song, popping s***.  I am not going to do that today because my heart has to be in it and my heart is not and it would disrespectful to St. Louis and to myself for me to fake it.  Trust as many hateful, racist, and plain ole' mean comments as I got on my blackberry...........on my email.............. dm's on twitter.........etc, there is enough love for St. Louis elsewhere.  I have to let this hurt run its course.....and it would reflect in my writing.

I don't get paid to be nice, I am paid because I am honest.

I haven't figured out how the end this book yet because I have been working on school.  But we'll figure out a way by Wednesday.

Allright Texas Rangers, let's go.

I am not going to fuss about what should have been.  The better team didn't win, but the team that should have did.  It is what it is.  You all have a strong component, but you all gotta shore up your pitching staff, the bullpen is fine.  Some teams just have your number not worried about Ugaundo but you need some aces and some kings too.

I am no less proud of you today than I was yesterday.  I have no need to lie.  Am I hurting this morning yes?  But more because I am losing my dogs and leaving my house. You all work and live in Texas a Texan and his or her dogs is serious business ;)  but I've already lost my marriage I understand that I have to endure this hurt before I can ever heal.........

This is going to hurt.  You all are going to be the chokers to the GREAT tony larussa and the MIGHTY St. Louis cardinals.  You are going to be the highlight reel of what went wrong for a long time.  Wash is going to be remembered as an unorthodox coach who could not withstand the great legend that is Tony.  Freese and Berkman and Pujols will be the good guys who finally put the Sauls of the baseball world in their place.

The fans are going to sigh and say not again.  Those who got interested in baseball got some hope that this was it this time, won't be there the next time.

But you know what it's allright.  It is allright, it don't feel like it now and it won't until next year, but trust it will be okay.

You'll be back next year, make history and finally get it done because you all just need a couple of pieces, have to make a hard decision about young, but other than that your core is strong.

I am going to end with why me and God had words.......and then we are going to have a song, that I use to get me through moments like these and I will be back at 4pm for the political spin.

Monday night, Tuesday morning.......

God says "Tiffani, there will be a game 7,........"

I am agitated " I'm like they can win it in 6, they just gotta get over that hurdle, this nation needs to see guys who are not perfect make it, to be rewarded in the sense of that you can fall down, but the victory is in getting back up.  Not a race thing with Wash, it is a life thing with Cruz, Josh, Wash, all of these dudes who have all of these wonderful stories........... "

God says "Tiffani, there will be a game 7.................and you and I both know what that means"

I reply " The Rangers are the better team....... not changing my call, it would be disrespectful to the Rangers and the cardinals, not my fault things became so racial, so political.......not changing my call, I think they are due, I think they can rise above, I know they lacking on a pitcher, and I know game 7 carpenter will be back, I know.......but I am not changing, I am going to keep supporting my team, I don't change sides for nobody, not even you God and you know that when you made me.  And I don't want them hurting like that, they have fought so hard, St. Louis got 10 damn championships........LaRussa he can moonwalk to the fame.  Don't give me that crap they need it more than the Rangers do.  Don't tell me it don't occur to some marketing execs that Tony and the storied legacy of the Cardinals will be tarnished if they lose to the Sauls of baseballs...... Don't belittle me like that.  If you telling me it is not meant to be, then so be it.  But don't insult me with the bigger plan stuff, I have to deal with that from Wonder Mike you call Obama daily......"

God is not mad, but he ain't pleased.........because by now, we both yelling, folk are coming in from the hallway, I will not relent, God does not relent......there is obviously going to be hard feelings between he and I, St. Louis has nothing to do with it, larger issues are at play. 

"Can't you understand that St. Louis needs this more than the Rangers do and that need will manifest on that field?  Can't you see that you can't be right all the time? Can't you see that the lesson is in what you will write after a loss, a bitter one because it will be bitter because you came so close? Can't you see that they not there yet."  he implores......

I sit there............for awhile "God, I have always been me even when I was afraid to be, I don't change sides, I don't cut corners, I don't run from losses.  If they lose, I will write, I will be honorable, but it will be hard for you and I for a moment because we both know the social and cultural implications that can be made from this series.  You got generations of kids and adults who way beyond leave it to beaver......And don't tell me that Fox and Espn and the way that this series is being covered don't reflect the obvious disparities.......This is more than baseball to me, God and I am going to be pissed, but I will be allright, just don't come in touching me on the shoulder with the Father crap."

We laugh because that is a pet peeve........and we go on with the day.

So this morning, Saturday..........

God comes in the room, he touches me on the shoulder, I move away, he is hurt. I am not.  Hey, I am just that chick at times.......

"Are you angry with me Tiffani?"

"No, I am not, I don't like my daddy's hurting this morning, and I know with the way they lost, they hurting, I don't want them fussing at each other, I want to be able to take this pain for the team, for that nation..... I just don't want you touching me because you have to do to do and your will, your way prevailed and the message of a team who exemplified team and not the individual led by a black manager in a sport that is still deemed intellectual to be defeated by the Rove of baseball who is white............and I would be lying if that doesn't burn me up because I didn't realize it was so racial until I got all of these messages, to me it was just a good darn game and series.

I just don't want you touching me.  Fox programming went through all of the history of the Cards nothing about the historic ride of the Rangers, it was Game 7 for both teams, for both sets of fans...... I understand covering St. Louis but couldn't the Rangers get a little love.......But your will, your way."

Me and God sit there for a long time this morning.

"Tiffani, you and I both know the Rangers are going to be back........And you and I know that having at least one pitcher that could get threw it would have helped, and that with Felix, well, sometimes you just can't fight fate, you can't always whop destiny's ass....... "

"St. Louis has a very good team, they are the champs, so I am not going go through the calls, the fluid strike zone, they won, what else do you want me to say?  Fox and MLB got what they wanted to keep, baseball "pure", your angels in St. Louis are okay and have another ring and the fact of beating a big, black(not just in race) team from Texas makes it all the more sweeter.......But this is all you are going to get out of me, not writing no songs, not doing none of that.  I don't fake for anyone." my tone is starting to get decidedly colder.......

"Okay, Tiffani.........Okay........ but remember election night, remember what you did after the feeling of shock and hurt and sorrow went through your souls in crashing waves.......what did you do?" he asks wanting to touch my shoulder but doesn't.

I laugh ruefully.............because I know where he is going with this...........I laugh so hard I can't tell if I am crying or laughing or what..........

"I prayed for strength, let myself hurt because I knew that it was it was going to take to heal and by the time morning came I was at work with a plan to defeat Obama at all costs............." I finally said.

"Because that's what champs do, you aint gotta have a ring to be a champ, but you need to be a champ to get a ring, Tiffani, they just had to learn the hard way, everything is bigger in Texas even the lessons.............y'all needed a lesson that is going to hurt, but it will make this team, this organization much stronger when it heals.......won't be overnight, though"

That's it................. Not about the Cardinals............about the fact that the coverage wasn't fair, the strike zone wasn't up for interpretation, not about none of that because it doesn't matter, it wouldn't have mattered if you won, so it doesn't matter now.  I am proud that each of you was willing to stand up, I know that faces are going to change, some new coming in, some old leaving out, that's the about baseball, nobody not even the cardinals can stand up against father time, that's what makes each championship so special.

So nod your caps to them, be strong, give gracious comments and let them celebrate and have their moments, Detroit let you all have theirs and Tampa bay.......

So for all of you all that know you are going to be here, the next season started tonight the moment the game ended and before you can do anything else.



When you lose the one you love
You heart goes through changes

Especially when your sweet memories
Still hold their thrill
And just when you think
The pain is all gone
Don't fool yourself
'Cause here's the deal
That's the way love works
You've got to hurt before you heal
Oh, yes you have

You gonna cry all you gonna cry
And when the tears
They may stop falling
They may stop falling all down your face
But they still fall down your heart

You never know
How long the wound'll take to heal
It might take months
It could take years
But that's the way love works
You've got to hurt...oh...before you heal
I said before you heal

You're gonna cry
Oh, you're gonna cry
And when the tears
They may stop fallin'
They may stop fallin' down your face
But they still fall down your heart

Oh you never know
How long the wound'll take to heal
It might take months
It could take years
But that's the way love works
Uh huh, you got to hurt
Well before you heal
Oh yes you have

Just when you think the pain is all gone
Don't fool yourself
'Cause here's the deal
And that's the way love works
Lord you got to hurt before you heal
Oh yes you have
That's the way love works
You got to hurt...well...before you heal
Let us sing it one more time
That's the way love works
Lord you got to hurt before you heal
Oh yes you have
That's the way love works
Lord you got to hurt before you heal...

Bobby "Blue" Bland

And you get back up, you all give each other goodbyes, claws and antlers.....go home to your families, let them love on you, let us love on you, and you get ready for the next season.  B/c that's what champs do, at least the ones with rings :) 

I love you, I am proud of you......, that's the way love works, that's the way baseball go.

I gotta pack, I got traded just report in the spring when the doctors give me clearance.......

Spend time with your family, My Rangers, embrace the hurt, because until you do, you can't heal.

Be back tomorrow.

Post a Comment