Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The Time (Chapter 11)

Hello America,

I am sorry about yesterday.

It is ironic that people label Texas as the hotbed of racism in this country but for the most part, I've had my most racist moments in the North and West of this country.  I went to graduation Friday and got hooded and walked with my cap and gown to get something to eat.  People of all colors congratulated me and it made me realize that no matter how much this was just something to get done for me.  I'm just a matter of fact type of person.  It nevertheless means something.

I went to graduation Saturday and got to hear Dr. Bernice A. King speak.  As much as I generally identified with Dr. MLK King, I identified personally with Malcolm X and his evolution and his path.  Even before I ever went to jail, there was something that resonated with me in Malcolm and it wasn't the violence or anything like that.  It was the heartbreak and betrayal that he endured with the likes of Louis Farrakhan and the Nation of Islam that showed us that at times within their organization, God's words were just a hustle.

During my undergraduate years, I did a lot of reading.  So much so, that I had to get permission to read certain masonic books and things of that nature.... I learned that Dr. King was a socialist, in many senses, he was for equity and parity no doubt, but in many ways, he was what could be called an advocate for socialism.  I understood his point but I never agreed with it.  As I listened to his daughter, I could feel that slant coming through.  For she implored the graduation class to fight for humanity....

And to her credit, it wasn't just about race, creed or culture, it was about all of us that roam this land we call earth.  I could feel the urgency and passion in her voice as she talked about topics from Treyvon Martin to the general fight for justice.  She talked about her mother and father...  And that speech stuck with me... because she implored us to keep fighting until all of us can win ..

But the question that I wondered about is what all are we going to win... We can't win all of the same thing, while it is an ethical goal and moral goal, it cannot be the goal of government.

What we can fight for is the chance for each of us to possibly win if we put in the work....  and I understand Dr. King's point that every one doesn't have a fair chance.....

I am at a place of employment where I was told that I was to be making a lateral move within management but it was a lie to get me out of my position.  I was treated unfairly not just because of my race but because of my gender in addition to my education.  The people involved who lied have been promoted while I sit here tied by God's instructions not to fight back, but to be honorable and keep going ....

I was so down yesterday because it's frustrating.  Sunday on my way to a Chaka Khan concert, this older white man literally pushed me and a friend out of the way to get across the street and when we said something to him, a younger white male told us to be quiet and not "start" anything versus saying anything to the man who was clearly wrong....  And Tuesday, I came into work and the autonomic responses of the mgmt in my company which is pretty much 99.1% white, presumptuous and threatened chose the route of once again of labeling me emotional, when in fact, I am direct and to the point and don't respond to an iota of the disrespect I have to endure from the nature of my job...... 

I don't want to be a bitter black woman whose been burned and turned off by racial encounters, I refuse to be.  So I've been back watching the Texas Rangers for the past couple of games....

The team has been in a slump, and things just having been going well. but the last couple of games, they have won at the last minute....

But that's a misstatement, they overtook the score at the last minute, but they won the game a long time before that, by never giving up.  Never quitting, getting excited when a teammate makes that hit or that home run....

Understanding that it is going to take all of us....  every play, every pitch, every throw, every hit to overcome the roads that society and the media want us to walk down.

To overcome and endure and survive the slumps and valleys.......  It takes a winning attitude, it takes a pure delight as I saw the smile and fire that is Elvis Andrus again in the dugout.  It takes an honesty in Ron Washington saying right now, y'all this ain't us, this ain't it, it's time to fight.

It takes a Joe Nathan saying, until they remove my name from this Ranger jersey, I'm fighting every pitch, every play....  I ain't holding nothing back....

It takes all of us doing what we need to do to put any of us in a position to win......

I looked at that game another last minute homer last night, but you could feel the energy in the air, even before the last swing was made.

I want a nation in which every last one of us wins the chance to make our own destiny.  From a governmental standpoint that is all that can be hoped for and it is an eternal battle.

From those exploiting race from the left the likes of Al Sharpton to those on the right like Peter King...

They want us losing sight of what this great nation was built on....

opportunity....

So God came to me and said "It's only going to get worse, every significant employment you've had, you've hit a glass ceiling with a crash not a dud, and you fought to no avail for yourself, although just like at this job others will benefit from your failures....    When Paul and Christie and Rubio, see how much of a threat you are, it's only going to get messier and uglier and everyone from the right to the left is going to exploit race and gender and class to bring out the worst in you.........."

I could do nothing but God's words but nod and simply say

 We goin to get through tho
We goin' to get through tho

I cant be worried bout no devil's rook
I  can't be worried bout what I do lack
I can't be worried 'bout how defeat look
Cuz my job to ensure the same chances I had
So my fire ain't going to never fades
The future of this nation's path
is before us called destiny
No way in hell will I go, until I hear freedom's sweet roar

We going to get through tho b/c we know our worth
Deep down in our hearts is the love for what we value most
And we ain't going to be taken off our damn road
We ain't going nowhere you see
We going to be our own saints to save ya
It don't get no reala and we ain't backing down no more
We goin' to get through yo

Torpedo (Soto's Yell)
Written by Tiffani El Dawn Mims (ASCAP Licensed)

My point is that I'm going to fight for all of us to win a chance to be whatever we want or need to be in the land of freedom.....

And even though I'm human and pulled by racism, sexism, job discrimination, petty politics.....And I get tired.. and weary....

I put on my Ranger jersey in my mind and remind myself of these last couple of games, the legacy of mighty force of teamwork that has been built over the years.... a band of brothers supporting each other, through every possible moment on the field....

I put on my cap that says America, and I fight so that this nation can survive....

I'm not backing down no more...

We going to get through yo 

I'm running for President of the United States of America.....

So we can each win in our own definition of victory....  

Come what may....

We will get through.
 





 
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